10) Select team with largest city population. Lookin' good, St. John's!
9) Follow the experts – Obama and LeBron.
8) Wherever the chicken poops.
7) Wherever Houchins poops.
6) Watch Hoosiers prior and pick every team with a "Jimmy" on the squad.
5) Take Brian Inman's advice.
4) Have a 3-year-old do it. Otherwise known as The Don O'Brien Method.
3) Always take the Yankees over the Confederates.
2) Advance all schools that have a Tiger Woods mistress.
1) Green Parrot dancers make your selections.