10) Subtitles for Arnold and Stallone.
9) An ugly chick in distress.
8) A Columbian landlord ... not a drug lord.
7) An Oscar-winning performance from Daniel Day-Lewis
6) Anybody with their real hair … and face.
5) A bad guy shooting and hitting a good guy.
4) Jean-Claude Van Damme.
3) A spoken word with 10 or more letters.
2) A plot.
1) A profit. It doesn't make money unless Chuck Norris says it does.