10) Buried with only your pom-pon covering your spirit stick.
9) Had Blue Devil ordained and then with lighted torch perform your wedding ceremony.
8) Divorced your wife after her third affair -- this one with a Cowboys fan.
7) Due to same college affiliation, yelled "M-I-Z" and awaited follow-up during the reading of your uncle's obituary.
6) Tattooed "Bob" on one cheek and "Cats" on the other.
5) Even the male cheerleader says you're annoying.
4) Drink daily dose of antifreeze in hopes of literally "bleeding Cubbie blue."
3) Sang the school song during conception of your kid.
2) Named your daughter after the school's nickname -- "Cougar." She may some trouble later life.
1) You were loved so much they asked you to repeat three years.